Tiny nibbles

Nothing says "I tolerate you" like a card that says "bite me."

For the red-hot relationship that's cooling off in a hurry, this sumptuously crafted card of varying textures and whimsical images really hits the spot. It can be yours for $4 plus shipping. It's an average 4.25x5.5" size, so if you feel like mailing it to your soon-to-be-ex, it'll take a standard stamp. (Whatever that is this week.)

Personally, I'm inordinately fond of the dragonfly brad. It makes my heart go pitty-pat. It could do the same for whomever you're dissing.




For the slightly more annoying ex-flame, might I recommend a globally-themed au revoir?

It's a festive way to say sayonara, and it even has a darling little resin-encased bug on one of the brads. Fun stuff. Yours for four bucks plus shipping! Just email me!

Fixin' to get ready

Years ago, Wesley and I saw a Blake Clark stand-up routine in which he quoted his brother as "Fixin' to get ready" for -- oh, I forget what. The point is, that phrase is perfectly useful for a number of Southern pursuits.

And I am, in fact, fixing to get ready.

I'm going to post my snarky cards for sale on my blog.

No, my blog doesn't have the wide readership it used to have.

Yes, Etsy is elegant and more popular.

But darn it, Etsy has the same lax attitude toward security as Facebook. I am not a fan.

So here's my personal assurance: If you buy a card from me, I promise not to tell anyone your name or address or email or PayPal info. You can count on me. I can keep secrets. I have, for instance, never told a soul what Jennifer W told me in the summer of '83 about exactly what she had or had not done with A Certain Boy at Separation Bridge between the girls' camp and the boys' camp. Never. I have NEVER told anyone. And you cannot drag that info out of me now.

(And I did tell Jenn that she absolutely could NOT get pregnant that way, too, because I am nice like that.)

So if you want to buy a snarky card -- or maybe a handmade scrapbook album or two -- then keep watching the blog. They'll appear eventually. And I'll make my PayPal info known to you then, too.