GOOOOOAAAAALLLL!!!!!!!

Like a Spanish soccer commentator, I'm finding this phrase ringing in my head: GOOOOOAAAAALLLLL!!!!!!!

Why? Why does the new year make people start asking each other, "What are your goals?" Why does every shrink tell her patients to set goals? Why is it so important to know where you're going in order to figure out why you're right here right now? Why, why, why, why, why?

OK, I'm tired of fighting it. I'll figure this out. I will.

Besides, Cori said she would send me a goodie if I could turn my goals into a paper craft. And I like goodies. Might as well give it a whirl.

So, the website I went to said I needed to figure out what my *life* goals are first, then I can put the long-term and short-term goals into place to lead up to those *life* goals.

What is my goal in life?

Hmmmmm. I would like to live in a house that Mama would have liked. I live in a poorly designed hovel. It's not tidy. It barely qualifies as "cute." What would it take to turn this house into something Mama would have liked? A wrecking ball. That's kind of out of the question. So, next goal...

I would like to get my book published. First I have to finish the book. To finish the book, I have to rescue the files from a very old computer. To rescue the files from a very old computer, I have to install software and use the nifty little zip drive my sister gave me for Christmas. I can do that.... sometime this year. Then I can finish the book. Then I have to find an agent. *Then* I can work on getting the book published.

I want my children to be strong, smart, well-prepared, independent, responsible, productive members of society. I need to keep homeschooling them. I need to get the homeschooling thing under control. Woodrow needs more academic guidance than Emily. Emily needs more social guidance than Woodrow. I need to keep homeschooling them. Yeah, I said it twice. It bears repeating. January is always so hard for me and homeschooling.

Oh, here's a goal: I wanna be rich. Stinkin', filthy, disgustingly rich. So rich that people throw rocks at my limo as we pass on the street. Sure, it won't happen in my lifetime. But it's nice to have at least one goal that people can relate to. Back to the "finish the book" goal...

And... I wanna still be married to Wesley when I kick the bucket. Call me old-fashioned, but it seems like everyone I know gets divorced too quickly. When things are a little bumpy, wham! They throw in the towel and call it quits. Wesley and I happen to be in a place that is comfortably un-bumpy (even considering how much I ran up the Visa bill last year), but the one thing you can count on is that marriage has its ups and downs. Here's hoping that the next time we hit a bump in the road, we're both wearing our seatbelts.

(Besides, he's a good guy. He really is. Sorta grumpy and definitely getting more and more like his mother with every passing year, but very responsible and reliable.)

OK, this goal-setting thing is hard. I'm going to go have a cup of coffee now. Maybe I'll have goals set by next month? Don't hold your breath!