Project Runway, Season 3, Ep. 2

Forgive my tardiness, but right after I watched Project Runway with my sister last night, I took her to her motel and a freak storm zoomed through my neighborhood and took out a transformer and a bunch of trees. We're all OK. There's a mess to clean up, and with the power out, I didn't get any sleep. (Too hot!) But nothing was damaged that would cost moolah, thank heaven.

So -- I'm trying to gather my thoughts. So much happened last night, and so little of it was *good* except for the part about how Amy was here to watch it with me!

In general, I now officially totally resent four designers who haven't been kicked off yet even though they should be just on general principle, and sweet people keep getting kicked off before they have a chance to show what they can *really* do, and I honestly think of Heidi's kiss goodbye as a Judas kiss at this point.

::: deep breath! :::

LOL!!!

OK, Tim Gunn: Not enough of him in this episode. More Tim, more Tim, more Tim! In fact, let's get rid of the judge chat and just let Tim talk during the last ten minutes of the show.

The judges: Thank heaven Michael Kors took a break! It was nice to do without him for a change! Vera Wang -- again, the guest judges this season are waaaayyyyyyy better than guest judges in previous seasons. Cool!

The Designers -- by Pairs
Laura and Michael -- Were totally ROBBED. This makes two challenges in which Michael was totally robbed. Their dress was by far the most glorious and elegant and it really made me sit up and say, "WOW!" I think the only reason they didn't win was because the color -- if it wasn't outright white, it was too close to white, and the Miss USA chick had specifically said, "No white." Silly girl! Everyone knows the girl in white wins the pageant! And Laura and Michael have steady personalities and worked together well. I hope they both make it to the Final Three. Seriously.

[Note after reading Tim Gunn's blog -- The fabric was supposed to be "nude." Ummm... OK, whatEV. Very close to white.]

Uli & Bonnie -- Uli -- I can't hear her name without thinking of the line from The Producers (the B'way recording), "ULLA! OO WAH WAH, WAH WAH WAHWAH!" To be honest, I think Uli's talented. She's made two pretty dresses so far, and she and Bonnie didn't start stabbing each other with scissors. I just can't get passionate about either of them. I loved it when Bonnie commented that she wanted to see some fights, because that sort of action was not far behind!

Keith & Bradley -- Um... I can't remember the dress. It was chiffon or organza or something, and it came up to a weird point in the front of the skirt, and it didn't stink, but it wasn't great. I just have issues with Bradley and Keith. For one, Keith is a design-stealing sack o' conceited crap. (At least, according to the rumors on the Internet.) I've crossed my fingers and toes that he's the one who eventually gets kicked off the show for cheating. Bradley is a different problem. I can't *remember* him. Every time I see that scruffy little guy, I think, "Who is that?" Then I look up his bio on the Project Runway site, and I am *still* stumped. Who the heck is Bradley and why does he keep cropping up? He *was* very funny with the bodice of the dress. And Keith gave him a "drop dead" look. That was mildly fun. Die, Keith, die!!!!!

[Also -- was anyone else totally creeped out when Keith put his hands all over Miss USA? Ewwwwwwww!!!!!]

Jeffrey & Allison -- Someone please kick Jeffrey off the show. Not for breaking rules, but for making absolutely awful dresses. And for the neck tattoo, which is just distracting. I cannot believe he's made it through two challenges without getting the boot. I felt sorry for little Allison. Who really is too pretty to be a designer. And their dress was a complete disaster. Can anyone say, "Santino Reborn"?

Kayne & Robert -- Oh! What a match made in heaven! They were adorable together, and such a joy to watch. I totally understood the controversial fabric choice. What I didn't understand was the inexplicable poodle poof at the bottom of the dress. It screamed "Barbie" all over the place! I was shocked when it won the challenge, but I'm happy that Kayne and Robert will both be around for another week. Those guys rock!!!

Vincent & Angela -- I defended Vincent last week on the D*S blog. Not any more. He's a trainwreck of a human being. I'm just waiting for him to be evicted from the competition because of a nervous breakdown. Angela, on the other hand, was very badly behaved when she wasted her half-hour of sketching time to try to butter up Kayne. I don't know how long she can last if she doesn't have evening gown skills at all. The dress -- entirely Vincent's creation -- was absolutely hideous. Hideous. Even Jeffrey's hot mess of a wrinkled satin gunnysack was better than Vincent's elf shoes on the shoulders. I'm shocked that no one defended Angela and told the judges what really went on in the work room!

And that leaves...
Malan & Katharine -- Wow, Katharine, can you throw your partner under the bus any faster? And Malan... Well, as far as I can tell, I am the only Malan fan in the world. Last week the message boards were full of rants against his "pretentious accent." I didn't find it pretentious at all. It was an accent, period. What I thought about Malan was that he was an insecure, sweet, sad little boy looking for reassurance. He was the first to compliment a competitor's design -- and he sincerely meant it. He was the first to confess to some insecurity during the first runway show. And he was the first to take the blame, the entire blame, for the poor design of his evening gown. I cried when sweet Malan got auf'd before that termagant Vincent. (Yes, I know "termagant" is usually reserved for humans of the female gender. And I know Vincent's married.) I just wanted to see more of Malan and let him have another chance. They gave second chances to so many undeserving designers before -- why couldn't they do the same for sweet Malan? His first dress (and wrap and *bag*) in the first challenge was gorgeous. Just because the evening dress was ill-conceived -- I mean, c'mon, the brown dress was not worse than Vincent's.

So, all in all, I'm disappointed that Malan's gone. I'm happy that Michael is still in the running. I can't wait to see what Kayne and Robert do in the upcoming episodes. And I *still* want to know who's going to get kicked off!!!!!

What did y'all think of this week's episode? And I hope you got to watch it with someone half as fun as my sister!